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I just re-read my last entry and I have to laugh. Last sentence: "Phone ... brb" Considering that was almost 2 years ago, you would think it was one hell of a conversation. Not so much, don't even remember who or what it was about. I've had 2 jobs since then, one of which I was fired from (very amusing story actually) and then rehired back by the team I was supporting as a vendor. My brother got married. Saw family I hadn't seen since I was 12. Been fighting my depression off and on (all the while being on meds & counseling). Exploring what I want to be when I grow up. Actually been on a few dates, even dated someone - long distance - for 3 months. Gained 50 lbs (not exactly the direction I was wanting). Completely cluttered up my house. Visited AZ for my dad's 60th bday. Yeah, that about sums up the time I've been gone. Sad. Very sad. I just started a beginning drawing class on Saturday, have 3 more. I'm preparing to take up sculpture / stone work. I want to be able to sketch my ideas first, then upload into my computer & do a 3-D rendition, followed by a clay model, and finally carve the stone. I'm really excited about the idea. Even have an idea on opening a store to sell it along with several other friends' artwork. Planning a trip to Samoa, hopefully next year (2010). Just need to save the money (isn't that always the case? Either have time or money but never both at the same time). I joined a gym a few months ago, even went a few times before work got in the way. Now I need to commit to it and get back again regularly. I'm tired of being out of shape. Yeah, I want to lose weight, but really - I want to just be fit. You know, walk without being drenched in sweat and out of breath in 5 minutes. Not needing a seat belt extender on the plane. Eat well, sleep well, enjoy life. The small things. I'd have to describe myself as a flake. I didn't used to be, but the last few years that is my reality. I avoid work, don't keep all my promises, live in my own little world, rarely return calls and emails. A lot of it is from my depression, but I suspect being stressed out is a big part, too. I took a quiz a few months ago about Chronic Stress - I had 16 out of 17 of the symptoms. When I stopped to think about it, I realized I'd had about half the symptoms 5 years ago and have only progressed from there. You'd think I'd learn to take care of myself; usually I'm a fast learner! Some people are able to do work that isn't satisfying because they have hobbies or family that is meaningful. I want to have that, but also have work that makes a difference. I've got a few ideas, just letting things unfold. It's good to think about at least. :) More to come, hopefully sooner than 2 years. LOL
Mood: Commuting again - 2009-04-28 Drawing is cathartic - 2009-04-26 Slightly productive - 2009-04-23 "Selfish" weight loss contestants, distracted thoughts, and adorable cats - 2009-04-23 Diary template created by rainfalls. No longer an active d-lander. Want your own diary? |